Perfect Place of Peace

Love is defined as an intense feeling of deep affection. But let’s be honest love is an action word. We feel that if you love someone you do certain things, you act a certain way, you give certain things and make other people feel “ the people you say you love”  a certain way by doing something. When I had a dozen roses delivered to me on Valentine’s Day it made me feel amazing. It was the action of sending those flowers to my job that let me know that there was love and compassion involved in that relationship.

But it took many years for me to learn that you teach people how to treat you. So I  always ask people when they tell me about their relationships or their negative partner not showing love. Their Partners not giving them affection, them feeling unwanted and unloved in a relationship. How do you treat yourself? How do you show love to yourself? When was the last time you did something to show love and affection to you?

 Again,  we teach people how to treat us. We teach people the things we like and the things we don’t like by what we accepting don’t accept. We allow other people to schedule our days and our events.  If a friend calls you up and asks what you are doing and you say nothing then they ask can you come go with me. That friend just created the rest of your day; they just influenced how you would spend the rest of your time. Now this is not saying you are a tyrant and not engaging new experiences. This just says that you have a set of standards that you follow.  This allows you to ensure that you are experiencing new things and yet allow your partner and friends to know the things that you accept and you don’t accept.

But let’s be mindful you can’t expect someone who’s honest, who’s faithful, who’s true, who’s loving to you. But you’re none of those things. Don’t ask someone to be something that you’re not willing to be yourself. We tend to judge others harder and rougher than we judge ourselves. When we do something wrong to other people we tend to say that we had a good reason. But if someone else does the same thing we want to damn them to hell.  That’s not the way it goes. Hold yourself to the same standard that you hold others to.

 Self-reflection is amazing for self correction. It’s something that we should do often.  The best person to check you on your shortcomings, your mishaps, and your inappropriate and unwanted behavior is you. Because at the end of the day you’re the only person who can change it.